The Church Crowd

Sometimes being a manager of a fast food place has it's perks. Like this one time at Taco Bell:




As I went into work one night, I passed a couple of churches.

"Crap, it's Sunday", I thought.

Well, if you work at a fast food place and you live in a religious community, you know that there is one group of people that are the 2nd worse to serve.

The first being rowdy high schoolers. The second being the Church Crowd.

As I walked into work, I thought to myself, "No, not tonight. Tonight, I make my stand."

I went to the back and grabbed the box of letter we put out on our sign up front. I went outside int the freezing weather and put up a new sign.

It said: "Jesus didn't die so you could eat tacos".

Sure enough, church was over and in pulled a dozen or so cars.

I watched them park outside. One guy got out. looked at the sign, called out to somebody, and pointed at it.

They came inside and went up to the cashier.

"I would like to talk to your manager", the guy who pointed said.

I stepped up to the counter, identified myself as manger and asked him what the problem was.

He asked what was up with the sign out front.

I told him, "Well sir. It's almost Christmas. We here at Taco Bell would like to remind our customers what the holiday is all about. It's all about Jesus dying to absolve us from eating tacos."

He was flabbergasted. He told me, "Jesus died for our sins."

I looked at him with the most serious face I could put on and said, "Eating tacos is a sin, sir."

That caused quite an uproar. The Church Crowd started to shout.

I yelled at them to be quite. I went and grabbed a taco.

I held it up and said, " Do you see it's shape? This taco resembles a certain part of the female body. And what of the burritos? To even the most decent of minds, the burrito recalls the male sexual organ! When you eat this food, it is symbolic of fornication. Of Lust! Of Sin!"

They all looked around at each other.

One shouted out, "Let's go to Burger King!"

They left. Victory was mine.