I had been going out with this girl, Emily, for about two months. She broke up with me last week.
And the way she broke up with me really stuck in my craw.
Last Wednesday:
We were at the Olive Garden. With her sister and her boyfriend. Who had found out they were pregnant.
Emily thought it would be great to have a dinner to celebrate.
All on my dime.
I'm paying for 4 people at the Olive Garden.
Fine, nothing wrong with that. I do this little thing for her and her sister, so I'm pretty much guaranteed to get laid, right?
Wrong.
We have the dinner, talk, all that jazz. Emily and I get in the Jeep to go home.
Then she drops it on me.
Emily: You were being typical you last night.
Me: What do you mean?
Emily: You didn't show one once of excitement for Matt and Amy's baby.
Me: Why would I be excited about that?
Emily: Because she's my sister. And I'm going to be an Aunt.
Me: So? It's not like you won a sweepstakes. People get pregnant all the time.
Emily: But you should care because it's happening to people close to us.
Me: Close to you. I hardly know your sister and Matt seems like a hose-bag.
Emily: You don't care about anything unless it happens to you. You are selfish.
Me: Just because I don't show interest doesn't mean I don't care.
Emily: Tonight was a test.
Me: Oh well, Professor, did I pass?
Emily: No. You failed. You have never cared about anything that happens in my life. When my Uncle died last month you just shrugged. Whenever I tried to talk to you about my father, your mind always seemed to be on something else. I'm sorry. I can't be with you anymore.
I dropped her off at her house and I went home angry that she conned me into paying for her dumb sister's dinner.
Saturday:
I decided to write one of my Congressmen to thank them for fucking everything up. And to send them an email, I had to include my zip code. And those 4 other digits at the end of the zip code that nobody ever uses. So, I entered my zip code into Google.
The first site listed was the Registered Sex Offenders List for my area.
Curious, I looked through it.
And lo-and behold...my Ex's father was on the list.
Things began to make sense.
The father was never in the picture. She wanted to talk about him. I never cared...but this was it. She wanted me to know he was a sicko. From the little I did hear, she hated him.
A plan formed in my mind.
Sunday:
I called up the father. Told him I was a friend of Emily's. Said she had been talking about him lately. Said she had turned to God and was now big on forgiveness. Told him she wanted to look past what he had become and only wants to see him as her father. But, she needed someone to give her a push, so to speak, and asked me to call.
I told him she wanted to meet him at the Olive Garden, Monday at 8. He said he'd be there.
I called Emily up.
Told her I had been thinking about all that she had said and that she was right. Told her I wanted to talk with her. She thought that would be a good idea. I told her to meet me at the Olive Garden at a quarter till 8 on Monday.
Monday:
I got to the Olive Garden.
Emily was already there. We got a table and I began talking. All B.S. of course. At five minutes till 8, I excused myself to go to the bathroom. I awaited at the entrance.
Her father hadn't let me down.
I told her Emily was here and she was ready to talk. I shook his hand and he walked in.
I stood near the dining room entrance and watched my sweet revenge,
She looked up and saw her father standing at the table. He said something but she stood up and yelled, and I do mean yelled at him to get the hell away from her.
She screamed this a few times, looked around and saw me.
I waved at her and smiled.
She ran up to me and said. "Did you do this?"
I said, "Sure did."
She screamed, "He molested me!"
She then slapped me. Broke my $200 pair of sunglasses.
I could take her to small claims court over that, but the emotional damage I caused last night was well worth it.
